Don’t cry and don’t act like a girl, Every boy has heard these in his life. We live in a society where men are pictured as strong and powerful. We’ve got statistics through the roof of men killing and no one wants to talk about it, no one wants to say okay maybe we need to afford men the opportunity to speak about how they feel maybe we need to take some of the stigmas away of what it is to be kind of a man in society and I feel like we get very caught up on this kind of men should be men but in reality what is a man what do you need as a man to be the best possible person. You can be not in society but for yourself you know to feel good about yourself men are walking around with all these emotions and society telling them not to talk about it and they just come out in really destructive ways like you get men out there fighting each other killing each other because they have poor emotional management if they took the time out to look at maybe some of the hurt and upset that has been going on in their lives they wouldn’t be acting like this to lose each other.
I think for me mental health the relationship probably really does a lot of trauma. I’ve also had friends who have attempted to take their lives just because they don’t feel like they’re able to verbalize and don't know what’s going on in there life. It is very acceptable to show anger but they’re kind of not socialized.
Put yourselves in those heavy shoes for just a second and imagine then being told to deal with it. The constant suppression of a male’s emotions hereafter day after day year after year layer over layer what happens when there’s no more space left to suppress these emotions when all that masculinity and all that macho and all that strength finally wears out.
In this world men are three times more likely to become dependent on substances such as alcohol drugs or cigarettes it also says that one in eight men are likely to be diagnosed with a common mental illness like anxiety or OCD and suicide. Suicide is the leading cause for four of men of death for men 135 but wait this can't show the whole picture I mean how could it these are chest percentages and recordings taken off of men who have actually spoken up but even then there are men in the world who even in the roughest points in their life feel like their emotions aren’t valid to be spoken about or valid to be expressed and then what happens.
They break down they don’t have a strong connection with their emotional science which causes them to be paralyzed from figuring out what’s causing these emotions to arise how to deal with them and how to put them into words and then comes denial and comes anger then whats the main outlt for anger violence and in many ways. We know how this violence reflects at home in social circles and communities, we hear it on the radio, we read in the news, we see it on social media every single day and in a world that’s already so consumed with violence hate and anger why must we continuously send our boys on a path that leads to more anger that trains them to be so rough and so tough.
For many people crying is a sign of weakness but I think crying is the sign of a stronger human being regardless of gender because this human being has a connection between this and this so why don’t we nurture more men more boys to develop this connection.
So lets start early lets give them the switch because what we need to do is transform the way society raises boys and continuously tells them that their emotions cannot be spoken about or that they can’t cry about it what this will do in the long run is that when a boy grows up and its put in a messy situation his response to that situation will be an intricate blend and soft and heart of emotion and logic there won’t be a constant suppression over time of emotions. This could lead to healthier lifestyle boys and men would understand and be more likely to understand the consequences of their words and actions on other people and maybe just maybe dare I say we won't feel the need to be so dominating all the time.
Phrases like boys don’t cry and don’t act like a girl will eventually become obsolete and it needs to STOP.